Today has been incredibly uncomfortable and I have had this feeling of helplessness that just won't go away!
The breeze of the wind has been nice, making the hot temps more tolerable but having to depend on the breeze has been frustrating to say the least. It reminds me all day long that our air conditioner is not working and that we don't have to money to fix it. Neither Tyler nor I know exactly what is wrong other than it just isn't cooling the house down at all. And there was a time where our power was turned off again due to money matters, Tyler seems to think that the a/c worked before "that" happened and since the powers been turned back on it hasn't worked since. He seems to think that flipping the switch on the box in the basement made something stop working on the unit. *sigh*
To the point of leaving myself breathless, I had to take Ethan to the Dr's office AGAIN! Am I doing something wrong here? I just feel that there is something, some trick, some recipe for successfully keeping your child healthy. E has all these bumps all over him, chicken pox-esque; but that is not it (E is too young). The kid even has this rash in his groin area and I even think that it bothers me way more than it does him because he hasn't even attempted to itch or touch it. When we went to the appointment, which we got last second and I am sooooo greatful, Dr. C did not examine the one area where it is effecting Ethan the most. I am almost ready to throw my hands up with the doctor because maybe just maybe something else could be done...I am having a hard time letting go and letting GOD.
Today has been a down sort of day for me...I can't help but feel that I am just letting Ethan's childhood slip by. He isn't on time for some milestones and I can't help but feel that its my fault. :( We want a bigger place so we can expand our family but we can't even handle the house we have. Our mower is broken (so our front yard is like a jungle), bills are barely getting paid, and we don't have any permanent daycare/sitting person for Ethan so that we can work ( and even get some overtime) so things like the a/c & mower can get fixed. I have a lot to pray about and hopefully you will pray for us too.
A little bright side...
Yesterday I watched a movie called "The Vow" with Rachel McAdams and Channing Tatum. I love the whole idea of the movie especially since it is based on a true story but if I rated the movie I would give it a B-/C+ and that is being generous. The ending made you feel like there was a scene that got accidentally edited off at the end making you think that there was more to the story that could have been shared.
Today, I saw another new-ish movie. This movie is called "Bridesmaids" and it has a bunch of SNL actors and even a few from the tele show "The Office". It is sooooooooooooooooooo funny! Definetly an A+
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Good Intentions Aren't Always Met...
Studies have shown (now keep in mind this study has only been proven by one person ME :) ) that writing can totally like destress you. Well when you have a busy work day or are running errands that pretty much keep you away from the computer it seems as if you just have to settle with being stressed & exhausted to a point. I figured if I can get myself to form a habit of doing this at least once a week I can have a forum to vent aside from Facebook because we all know that now a days you can't post to Facebook without offending someone even though you are posting your own personal feelings.
My job, which I have been at since March 18th (or so), has let me stay at home more than at work. I work 12 hours shifts, 3 days a week letting me be at home with Ethan 4 days a week! And I believe that Tyler and I have finally found a daycare/sitter for Ethan; so now we don't have to depend on taking him to various relatives houses in the area praying & hoping that it doesn't "inconvenience them". The kicker is that Tyler found this place on Facebook of all places. Yesterday, Tyler and Ethan went to go interview/check the place out; while I went with my Mom to get another thing panned out.
The people at Busy Bees Daycare in Long Creek seem to have their stuff together. True their prompt communication might be because we would be paying them money (for a service) but they respond to my emails or phone calls quickly. The best part is that Ethan liked the place. I wanted the place to be safe and comfortable for him. Tyler was able to let him down to walk around and he didn't fuss at all! Plus the night before that, Tyler, Ethan, & I drove out to the neighborhood where it is located and found it to be in a nice part of town. Prayers have finally been answered for that! :)
The reason why we had to divide and conquer yesterday was because, also through FB, I had found a dog house for Shiloh. It was cheap, much more so than anything than you could find brand new in stores. Plus, next to nothing had to be done to repair it. We felt that we could not really afford to pass this up at all and so I asked my Mom to help me in picking it up (she has a van and I just have a 2 door Toyota Yaris...ya). Thank goodness my Mom was available to assist me because there is no way it would have fit in or on my car; it barely fit in the van we used. I suppose that if we had taken out the back seat there would have been more than adequate room, but we didn't. Again prayers were answered on getting a place for Shiloh that way we could move her out to our house and out of where we have been keeping her at my parents old house. Then again, I have thought long and hard about even possibly giving her up for adoption but I know that would be hard on Tyler because he loves her. Then again the attention that either of us have given Shiloh has been dismal because it seems as if all we would do is go feed her and leave. Sometimes we would let her out for a small amount of time, sometimes longer...and most of the time it would be me doing it. I hope that having her at out house will help but we can't afford for her to tear up our yard or for us to do improvements to our back yard sooner than anticipated. We're just trying to do the best for everyone involved.
I think that everyone (including the doctors and other people involved in the growth of children) recommends that toddlers have no more than 1 & a half hours of tv a day. Hmmmmmm.....while Ethan has been asleep (& awake) I have been looking for so many ideas to help keep him active (because he is!) and not bored while not watching too much tv. I want the best for him so if anyone has any of their own activities that they have done with their children go ahead and let me hear them...PLEASE! Ethan likes going to the lake and watching the ducks, going on walks, playing at the library...but he also loves watching the weather report during the news, Jeopardy, Toy Story 3, Cars 2, & Monsters Inc. Anytime that I am off to take Ethan to the library during their toddler time that they have Ethan gets all shy and clings to me like nothing else...I try to get him around other kids his age when I can (which is also why I am hoping that taking him to the daycare will help him with that) but its not always that often. :/
My job, which I have been at since March 18th (or so), has let me stay at home more than at work. I work 12 hours shifts, 3 days a week letting me be at home with Ethan 4 days a week! And I believe that Tyler and I have finally found a daycare/sitter for Ethan; so now we don't have to depend on taking him to various relatives houses in the area praying & hoping that it doesn't "inconvenience them". The kicker is that Tyler found this place on Facebook of all places. Yesterday, Tyler and Ethan went to go interview/check the place out; while I went with my Mom to get another thing panned out.
The people at Busy Bees Daycare in Long Creek seem to have their stuff together. True their prompt communication might be because we would be paying them money (for a service) but they respond to my emails or phone calls quickly. The best part is that Ethan liked the place. I wanted the place to be safe and comfortable for him. Tyler was able to let him down to walk around and he didn't fuss at all! Plus the night before that, Tyler, Ethan, & I drove out to the neighborhood where it is located and found it to be in a nice part of town. Prayers have finally been answered for that! :)
The reason why we had to divide and conquer yesterday was because, also through FB, I had found a dog house for Shiloh. It was cheap, much more so than anything than you could find brand new in stores. Plus, next to nothing had to be done to repair it. We felt that we could not really afford to pass this up at all and so I asked my Mom to help me in picking it up (she has a van and I just have a 2 door Toyota Yaris...ya). Thank goodness my Mom was available to assist me because there is no way it would have fit in or on my car; it barely fit in the van we used. I suppose that if we had taken out the back seat there would have been more than adequate room, but we didn't. Again prayers were answered on getting a place for Shiloh that way we could move her out to our house and out of where we have been keeping her at my parents old house. Then again, I have thought long and hard about even possibly giving her up for adoption but I know that would be hard on Tyler because he loves her. Then again the attention that either of us have given Shiloh has been dismal because it seems as if all we would do is go feed her and leave. Sometimes we would let her out for a small amount of time, sometimes longer...and most of the time it would be me doing it. I hope that having her at out house will help but we can't afford for her to tear up our yard or for us to do improvements to our back yard sooner than anticipated. We're just trying to do the best for everyone involved.
I think that everyone (including the doctors and other people involved in the growth of children) recommends that toddlers have no more than 1 & a half hours of tv a day. Hmmmmmm.....while Ethan has been asleep (& awake) I have been looking for so many ideas to help keep him active (because he is!) and not bored while not watching too much tv. I want the best for him so if anyone has any of their own activities that they have done with their children go ahead and let me hear them...PLEASE! Ethan likes going to the lake and watching the ducks, going on walks, playing at the library...but he also loves watching the weather report during the news, Jeopardy, Toy Story 3, Cars 2, & Monsters Inc. Anytime that I am off to take Ethan to the library during their toddler time that they have Ethan gets all shy and clings to me like nothing else...I try to get him around other kids his age when I can (which is also why I am hoping that taking him to the daycare will help him with that) but its not always that often. :/
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